Scans are in….. Eric: 1 Cancer: 0
On Monday 12/10, I went in for the definitive PET Scan and CT scan of the entire body and the results came back VERY positive.
All of the tumors showed reductions in sizes from 30% to 80%, and there did not appear to be anything new. The Lung tumor showed a 60% reduction, Lymph nodes 80% reduction and the largest bone tumor showed a 50% reduction.
The bottom line is that there is no question we are beating this!
There still will be a need for more chemotherapy to try to finish the job and I will still need a lot of prayers for more healing and the challenges of having to deal with 4 to 6 months more chemo. So I am not out of the woods yet, but it looks like there is a light at the end of the tunnel.
In fact today (Friday), I already started chemo back up again with a Carboplatin and Taxol party today. And I am scheduled again for 12/28. That will be the last chemo I do in Florida, under my current Oncology Team (we will greatly miss them, especially Dr. Lozada and Nurse Kathy). After that, I will be under the guidance of a new team of doctors in Chicago. More on that soon…
The week of 12/17 will be an especially busy and challenging one that we will need your prayers for strength, peace, and sanity. We fly to Chicago Monday afternoon. Tuesday morning is the closing on our new home. Tuesday afternoon we have pre-school interviews. Wednesday, Doctor appointments at the University of Chicago Cancer Center. Thursday, meeting at my new office all morning and into the early afternoon. We fly back Friday morning. I am exhausted just typing this…
And of course all of this is happening in the holiday seasons, which are hectic enough without all this other stuff.
So with that, Merry Christmas! I hope an pray you all have a safe and Merry Christmas and that you spend some time reflecting on the true reason of the season, the birth of our Lord and savior, Jesus Christ. We actually bake a cake, light candles, and sing happy birthday to Jesus! The girls get very excited for this!
Thanks so much for all of your prayers, cards, thoughts, phone calls, e-mails, visits, meals, and support over the last 6 months. I can tell you that I could not have made it without you all and feel confident that progress would not have been as substantial without your prayers and God’s healing touch. Many Stage 4 Lung Cancer patients don’t even get to see the backside of 6 months after their diagnosis, let alone get a chance to beat it. With your continued prayers I will do just that.
God Bless and Merry Christmas!
Eric
Friday, December 14, 2007
Sunday, November 25, 2007
HAPPY THANKSGIVING! 11/25/07
HAPPY THANKSGIVING! 11/25/07
To start, Happy Thanksgiving! I hope and pray that you all had a nice day and could spend time reflecting on what you can be grateful for.
We had a really nice Thanksgiving at the Plummer house in sunny South Florida. My brother Scott and his wife Amy, their daughter Lila, and new born boy Ethan traveled all the way from Austin, TX to be with us. And my mom and dad timed their return for four more weeks to help out so they could be here, too. It was really great to get everyone together and the cousins all had a blast together.
Long time since I have blogged and it doesn’t really seem like this much time has passed. I do have a lot of news to catch you all up on.
LAST RADIATION EFFORT SUCCESSFUL
Two weeks ago I underwent yet another amazing medical procedure called Cyber Knife. After our last bout with a rogue tumor causing mind debilitating pain leading to hospitals stays, I asked what other tumors are in my body that have the potential for that. A very quick answer came back that I had a 3cm tumor at the juncture where my spine and rib begin, that is right on the nerve and adjacent to my spinal column and that could very well cause me trouble in the future. Really????? Well what the @%#$ can we do about it NOW. The answer came back quick again. Cyber Knife. We’ll let’s do it. Ok. SO we set up the scans, the plan and in three visits down to the Cyber Knife Clinic of Miami (in Kendall), we took care of it.
CHEMO OVER
For starters, the Friday after Thanksgiving marked my last Chemotherapy session!!! There are no more scheduled infusions between now and a full work up of scans to determine what if any next steps are. I am praying very hard that I can be done with direct treatment (chemo, radiation, surgery). I can tell you the last two chemos have been more of a struggle for me. I have had to deal with more nausea than I have in the past. The doctors tell me it is just the cumulative effects. So, I am expecting this week to be a tougher one. I will rely on the thoughts that I may be done forever with chemo as positive motivation this week when I am feeling sick and down.
With the risk of letting you all know that I am not always some super tough – “I can do anything at all times” guy - I can honestly say that I am sick of being sick. I have not felt “right” since late June (the weekend of my first Chemo treatment). I am also tired of being weak. I have lost all my strength. But that leads me to my second piece of good news.
EXERCISE STARTED
This last week marked me starting up Aquatic Physical therapy for core, leg and back conditioning. I have also begun walking around my neighborhood. I can announce that I can already walk a half mile without stopping (about 15-20 minutes on my feet). Trust me in that this is a real improvement over what I started with. This is the renewal of my triathlon training. I will keep you posted on when I will set up my first competitive appearance!
HOME BOUGHT IN ILLINOIS
Amy and I went on a home search trip for a very long weekend three weeks ago. We saw a bunch of homes and had established a short list of three existing, but brand new homes or building one from scratch in a certain development. We essentially told all four builders that the best deal got our business and let them all know about each other. As the days passed, the deals got sweeter and then one finally made the move we couldn’t have dreamed of asking for and we jumped on it.
It is a very large 4 bed, 2.5 bath, home with a den in the Plainfield / Bolingbrook / Naperville area and will be only 15-20 minutes from my parents and 35 minutes from work if I can miss the bulk of rush hour.
Needless to say we are excited about the home and excited about that part of the process being over with. Now we just need to deal with selling our home and moving. That is the next topic aside from a clean bill of health that we need. We have only had two people look at the house in the time it has been on the market. Please pray that the right buyer will come soon.
I think that is all for me to write about right now. Thanks for all of your prayers. Sorry for those of you that check this frequently only to see that I have lamely waited another long time period to update.
I love you all,
Eric
To start, Happy Thanksgiving! I hope and pray that you all had a nice day and could spend time reflecting on what you can be grateful for.
We had a really nice Thanksgiving at the Plummer house in sunny South Florida. My brother Scott and his wife Amy, their daughter Lila, and new born boy Ethan traveled all the way from Austin, TX to be with us. And my mom and dad timed their return for four more weeks to help out so they could be here, too. It was really great to get everyone together and the cousins all had a blast together.
Long time since I have blogged and it doesn’t really seem like this much time has passed. I do have a lot of news to catch you all up on.
LAST RADIATION EFFORT SUCCESSFUL
Two weeks ago I underwent yet another amazing medical procedure called Cyber Knife. After our last bout with a rogue tumor causing mind debilitating pain leading to hospitals stays, I asked what other tumors are in my body that have the potential for that. A very quick answer came back that I had a 3cm tumor at the juncture where my spine and rib begin, that is right on the nerve and adjacent to my spinal column and that could very well cause me trouble in the future. Really????? Well what the @%#$ can we do about it NOW. The answer came back quick again. Cyber Knife. We’ll let’s do it. Ok. SO we set up the scans, the plan and in three visits down to the Cyber Knife Clinic of Miami (in Kendall), we took care of it.
CHEMO OVER
For starters, the Friday after Thanksgiving marked my last Chemotherapy session!!! There are no more scheduled infusions between now and a full work up of scans to determine what if any next steps are. I am praying very hard that I can be done with direct treatment (chemo, radiation, surgery). I can tell you the last two chemos have been more of a struggle for me. I have had to deal with more nausea than I have in the past. The doctors tell me it is just the cumulative effects. So, I am expecting this week to be a tougher one. I will rely on the thoughts that I may be done forever with chemo as positive motivation this week when I am feeling sick and down.
With the risk of letting you all know that I am not always some super tough – “I can do anything at all times” guy - I can honestly say that I am sick of being sick. I have not felt “right” since late June (the weekend of my first Chemo treatment). I am also tired of being weak. I have lost all my strength. But that leads me to my second piece of good news.
EXERCISE STARTED
This last week marked me starting up Aquatic Physical therapy for core, leg and back conditioning. I have also begun walking around my neighborhood. I can announce that I can already walk a half mile without stopping (about 15-20 minutes on my feet). Trust me in that this is a real improvement over what I started with. This is the renewal of my triathlon training. I will keep you posted on when I will set up my first competitive appearance!
HOME BOUGHT IN ILLINOIS
Amy and I went on a home search trip for a very long weekend three weeks ago. We saw a bunch of homes and had established a short list of three existing, but brand new homes or building one from scratch in a certain development. We essentially told all four builders that the best deal got our business and let them all know about each other. As the days passed, the deals got sweeter and then one finally made the move we couldn’t have dreamed of asking for and we jumped on it.
It is a very large 4 bed, 2.5 bath, home with a den in the Plainfield / Bolingbrook / Naperville area and will be only 15-20 minutes from my parents and 35 minutes from work if I can miss the bulk of rush hour.
Needless to say we are excited about the home and excited about that part of the process being over with. Now we just need to deal with selling our home and moving. That is the next topic aside from a clean bill of health that we need. We have only had two people look at the house in the time it has been on the market. Please pray that the right buyer will come soon.
I think that is all for me to write about right now. Thanks for all of your prayers. Sorry for those of you that check this frequently only to see that I have lamely waited another long time period to update.
I love you all,
Eric
Friday, October 26, 2007
Radiation, Blood Thining and The Interview 10/26/07
Hello! It’s been another 2 weeks and this time there has not been much to report on.
I can announce that I have gotten through the radiation treatment plan for my lower left back issues. My experience with this go around was MUCH better than the last two efforts that I reported on.
This time I had machine #2 (the new one) and not the 20 year old #1. That may have had everything to do with it. The only hassle was having to come to the hospital every day again for 12 straight week days.
I have also had to deal with blood thinning issues. My doctors want the test called the “PT/INR” to be between 2.0 and 3.0. (Normal people have blood “thickness” at around 1.0). So… they give you a medicine called Cumadin (don’t check my spellings of all these drugs… Just sound them out…) which is a long term maintenance drug. But because it is just that, maintenance, they need to jump start it with something called Luvanox, which is administered daily via (2) shots in the belly. This typically only goes on for 2-3 days, then you can just maintain with Cumadin. 2 ½ weeks later (and close to 40 shots in my belly) I am still only at 1.78! My waistline looks like a navigation chart of the galaxies. Fortunate they told me they are stopping the shots and just amping up the Cumadin in hopes of reaching the levels anyway.
Having daily shots administered at the hospital would normally be a burden but I was coming here for radiation anyway. And the timing of the halt of the shots luckily coincided with the radiation ending, so only the last two weekends were really impacted. I had to come in both Saturday and Sunday the last two weekends for the shots…
I confess, I was really tired of all the shots, the blood tests to see how stubborn my blood was being, plus all the other regular sicks and pokes for testing, chemo, etc… I am a human pin cushion. My arms are all bruised, and I probably look like some kind of junkie.
New topic: My hair is growing back weakly for some reason. I have also now added a goatee (because I can – call it a personal hair protest). My friends say I look like a mean/tough drill sergeant. Not the look I was hoping for or trying to convey. I don’t feel very tough these days. I fact, I have never been weaker in my life…
Other news: Channel 4 CBS did an interview with Dr. Tate and me due to that successful back surgery I did 8 weeks ago. It had been the first in South Florida and I guess the hospital pushed it as a PR piece that the Local News picked up. I must warn you so you won’t be too alarmed that my head appears to have swollen up the size of a Volkswagon. It is due to this Decadron steroid that I take (this is the same stuff that makes my legs weak and has turned my into an over-emotional person. I have to get off this stuff and hope to start weaning off it now that the radiation is done).
Anyway, if you are interested in seeing a video of the interview, here’s a link to it (copy and paste into your browser...):
http://cbs4.com/video/?id=41722@wfor.dayport.com&cid=5
If that doesn’t work, type this into their search field and it should pull up “Special Surgery Helps Spine Injury Victim”
The interview has turned me into a semi-celebrity at the hospital among the staff, with strange nurses and doctors saying Hi and congratulating me. Who knew cancer would lead to my 15 minutes of fame!
Our move efforts have been busy but pretty unproductive. Amy went of the first trip without me (I had to back out due to the new radiation plan requiring my daily presesnce…). She found about 8 homes she really liked and we are scheduling another trip for me to go back. Meanwhile we are trying to get our relocation outfit to get our house on the market. It has been a bit of a struggle with them and the realtors. Our home is in a very tough neighborhood to comp due to its size and location and the realtors can’t agree on a market price. This has become frustrating and we are really trying very hard to let God work this out for us and not keep trying to pull it back and worry about it. Especially since regardless where we can sell our home for, we will make a nice chunk of equity we didn’t have before. Its all God’s money anyway, right??? I read yesterday, very appropriately in Hebrews 13…
5Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said,
"Never will I leave you;
never will I forsake you."[a] 6So we say with confidence,
"The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid.
What can man do to me?"[b]
More on that in another blog.
In closing, I can report that I have been feeling pretty good over these last two weeks. Especially given the circumstance: Radiation AND Chemo… I have only really been fighting the fatigue from the radiation. Now that that’s done, I expect that I should be feeling much better as its cumulative effects wear off over the next 2-3 weeks.
Despite that my routine complaint is that “I am sick of being sick”, I definitely feel like I am getting off pretty easy compared to many of the horror stories I hear about in different support group settings and in the books I read. I thank and praise God for that. I know your all’s prayers are working! Please keep them going!
I’ll end on my all time favorite bible verse that seems so appropriate for a situation that demands a day to day out look and approach… It is also from Hebrews:
Hebrews 12: 1-11
1Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. 2Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 3Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
4In your struggle against sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood. 5And you have forgotten that word of encouragement that addresses you as sons:
"My son, do not make light of the Lord's discipline,
and do not lose heart when he rebukes you,
6because the Lord disciplines those he loves,
and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son."[a]
7Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father? 8If you are not disciplined (and everyone undergoes discipline), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons. 9Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of our spirits and live! 10Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. 11No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.
You all are my “cloud of witness” that is mentioned in verse 1. And I love you all for that.
Love, in Christ,
Eric
I can announce that I have gotten through the radiation treatment plan for my lower left back issues. My experience with this go around was MUCH better than the last two efforts that I reported on.
This time I had machine #2 (the new one) and not the 20 year old #1. That may have had everything to do with it. The only hassle was having to come to the hospital every day again for 12 straight week days.
I have also had to deal with blood thinning issues. My doctors want the test called the “PT/INR” to be between 2.0 and 3.0. (Normal people have blood “thickness” at around 1.0). So… they give you a medicine called Cumadin (don’t check my spellings of all these drugs… Just sound them out…) which is a long term maintenance drug. But because it is just that, maintenance, they need to jump start it with something called Luvanox, which is administered daily via (2) shots in the belly. This typically only goes on for 2-3 days, then you can just maintain with Cumadin. 2 ½ weeks later (and close to 40 shots in my belly) I am still only at 1.78! My waistline looks like a navigation chart of the galaxies. Fortunate they told me they are stopping the shots and just amping up the Cumadin in hopes of reaching the levels anyway.
Having daily shots administered at the hospital would normally be a burden but I was coming here for radiation anyway. And the timing of the halt of the shots luckily coincided with the radiation ending, so only the last two weekends were really impacted. I had to come in both Saturday and Sunday the last two weekends for the shots…
I confess, I was really tired of all the shots, the blood tests to see how stubborn my blood was being, plus all the other regular sicks and pokes for testing, chemo, etc… I am a human pin cushion. My arms are all bruised, and I probably look like some kind of junkie.
New topic: My hair is growing back weakly for some reason. I have also now added a goatee (because I can – call it a personal hair protest). My friends say I look like a mean/tough drill sergeant. Not the look I was hoping for or trying to convey. I don’t feel very tough these days. I fact, I have never been weaker in my life…
Other news: Channel 4 CBS did an interview with Dr. Tate and me due to that successful back surgery I did 8 weeks ago. It had been the first in South Florida and I guess the hospital pushed it as a PR piece that the Local News picked up. I must warn you so you won’t be too alarmed that my head appears to have swollen up the size of a Volkswagon. It is due to this Decadron steroid that I take (this is the same stuff that makes my legs weak and has turned my into an over-emotional person. I have to get off this stuff and hope to start weaning off it now that the radiation is done).
Anyway, if you are interested in seeing a video of the interview, here’s a link to it (copy and paste into your browser...):
http://cbs4.com/video/?id=41722@wfor.dayport.com&cid=5
If that doesn’t work, type this into their search field and it should pull up “Special Surgery Helps Spine Injury Victim”
The interview has turned me into a semi-celebrity at the hospital among the staff, with strange nurses and doctors saying Hi and congratulating me. Who knew cancer would lead to my 15 minutes of fame!
Our move efforts have been busy but pretty unproductive. Amy went of the first trip without me (I had to back out due to the new radiation plan requiring my daily presesnce…). She found about 8 homes she really liked and we are scheduling another trip for me to go back. Meanwhile we are trying to get our relocation outfit to get our house on the market. It has been a bit of a struggle with them and the realtors. Our home is in a very tough neighborhood to comp due to its size and location and the realtors can’t agree on a market price. This has become frustrating and we are really trying very hard to let God work this out for us and not keep trying to pull it back and worry about it. Especially since regardless where we can sell our home for, we will make a nice chunk of equity we didn’t have before. Its all God’s money anyway, right??? I read yesterday, very appropriately in Hebrews 13…
5Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said,
"Never will I leave you;
never will I forsake you."[a] 6So we say with confidence,
"The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid.
What can man do to me?"[b]
More on that in another blog.
In closing, I can report that I have been feeling pretty good over these last two weeks. Especially given the circumstance: Radiation AND Chemo… I have only really been fighting the fatigue from the radiation. Now that that’s done, I expect that I should be feeling much better as its cumulative effects wear off over the next 2-3 weeks.
Despite that my routine complaint is that “I am sick of being sick”, I definitely feel like I am getting off pretty easy compared to many of the horror stories I hear about in different support group settings and in the books I read. I thank and praise God for that. I know your all’s prayers are working! Please keep them going!
I’ll end on my all time favorite bible verse that seems so appropriate for a situation that demands a day to day out look and approach… It is also from Hebrews:
Hebrews 12: 1-11
1Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. 2Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 3Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
4In your struggle against sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood. 5And you have forgotten that word of encouragement that addresses you as sons:
"My son, do not make light of the Lord's discipline,
and do not lose heart when he rebukes you,
6because the Lord disciplines those he loves,
and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son."[a]
7Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father? 8If you are not disciplined (and everyone undergoes discipline), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons. 9Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of our spirits and live! 10Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. 11No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.
You all are my “cloud of witness” that is mentioned in verse 1. And I love you all for that.
Love, in Christ,
Eric
Monday, October 8, 2007
On the Move and Great News! 10/8/07
Unlike the last blog, a LOT has happened in the last two weeks for me. Some good, some bad, but overall, I have some outstanding news to pass on at the end.
For starters, the work situation has finally sorted itself out and we have some news that may be shocking: We are moving! After being in South Florida for almost 11 ½ years, my company is transferring us to Chicago. As of January 1, 2008, I will be the District Sales Manager of Chicago and Milwaukee areas (what comprises the “Chicago District”) for all of the sales functions: New Construction, Modernization and Service Sales.
We are very excited about this opportunity and the fact that we are returning home (but nowhere near as much as our parents are… especially my mom). We are also a bit nervous about the timing of a move given my treatments and what I am going through, but we feel strongly that God has a new season planned for us. He has always provided for this family in abundance and we know He will guide us through this, as well. We had turned this situation over to Him (and took it back many times, I promise you…) as much as any decision we ever have and have peace in it. We have already started working hard getting the house ready to show. And I’ll keep you updated on our house hunting.
Next up is the drama of last week…
The weekend was a full one. My brother, Scott, was visiting from Austin, TX, and Amy, mom and dad, were working hard on painting the kitchen cabinets and adding new door pulls, de-cluttering shelves, packing boxes to take to storage (to make the house seem bigger). On Sunday afternoon I was feeling good and helped reinstall door pulls and even installed a new cook top and was definitely pushing myself as far as I ever had with regard to bending over and working, but I truly needed to contribute. I was feeling emasculated just sitting on the couch all weekend while everyone else was working. Especially since so much of this stuff I have done in the past and even like to do… I went to bed Sunday feeling really tired but really good about finally contributing to the house prep.
Monday was an OK day physically and I was both excited and nervous about Tuesday a.m., when I would finally have my very first Aquatic Physical Therapy appointment, having had to cancel and postpone the first planned start after my last emergency hospital visit. Then Tuesday a.m. came and I awoke with a LOT of lower back pain on my lower left side. I probably should have stayed home, but I was determined NOT to miss this appointment. I went and told the therapist about the new low back pain and we went VERY easy. The appointment went awesome, but afterwards, the pain was now ramping up. I struggled home and couldn’t even get dressed. I lay in bed all day monitoring work via e-mail and phone and trying to use ice packs and pain meds to manage the pain that was still growing. By 5pm, I couldn’t get out of bed or even walk without Amy’s help. By 7pm, there was no way for me to lay, sit, or stand without pain, regardless of the amount of pain meds I took. It was frightening. Laying face down was the most comfortable I option I had. We decided to try to make it through the night then get admitted by my Doctor first thing, rather than go through another Emergency Room admission plan. See the 7/30/07 blog for how that route goes... The night was expectantly long, with me needing to use a make shift Gatorade Bottle urinal for my 60 minute interval pee schedule, but we got through it.
The next morning, the pain was the same and we struggled to my doctor’s office at 9:45am where we decided to do full scans to see what was going on with my back and check all of the tumors rather than wait until late November. We went to Admissions at 10:15am and I sat in a wheelchair until 12 noon, when they finally had a room ready for me. I then didn’t get any of the ordered pain meds until 1:30pm, which made only a small positive impact. The doctor then ordered a different pain med plan that the nurses didn’t get done before I had to go to “an MRI” scheduled for 3:30pm. My “an MRI” turned out to be three and I was in the machine for just under 2 hours. And yes it was the old one. Again. To her credit, Dr. Lozada had ordered an anesthesiologist to initiate “twilight” for me, but the guy never showed up. Again (second time). Fortunately, I was able to get through it with no meds and the pain was getting bearable. I think I can officially say that I have finally conquered my MRI claustrophobia.
From there I was wheeled to CT Scan where I waited for an hour in the hallway. I finally go back to my room around 7:30pm, where I got my first food since breakfast. At 8:30pm, I got a cell phone all from Dr. Lozada saying the scans showed two (2) pulmonary embolisms in the lungs (clots thrown from my legs) and this was an emergency situation and I needed surgery that night to install a filter in my main vein from the lower extremities to my torso. I guess you could say I literally dodged (2) bullets. A head or heart shot means stroke or death. Fun. I did finally get the pain med plan, a Delaudin pump, installed, and was finally able to lie on my back or right side comfortably. A HUGE improvement.
They then called in Dr. Tate and his team (he did the back surgery for me) at 9:30pm and I was wheeled back in my room at 11pm after yet another amazing go around with the technology they are using surgically… The filter is like an umbrella they guided up through my femoral vein and then expanded. This will catch any future clots. Plus I am now also on blood thinning meds, so right now I am the safest man on the planet with regard to protection from blood clots and pulmonary embolisms.
Now for the good news...
In all of this mayhem, Dr. Tate had reviewed the films of the scans and as able to tell us that there was a “substantial” reduction in the lung tumor mass!!! The other tumor sights also showed reductions AND there were no new tumors!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hallelujah!!!!!!!! Praise God!!!!!!! All of this #$%^&@ crap is working!!!! All of this hassle has meaning so far. I can’t tell you how very happy I am to report all of this.
The next day I found out the lung tumor is dying from the inside out, which is also another piece of good news, because that is apparently the way you want tumors to die.
So I did find out the back pain is being caused by the pesky tumor situated right on my sacroiliac joint (on the left side) and I needed to radiate it to kill it faster than the chemo would. The plan is to go back to radiation and chemo, and I will be doing 10-15 treatments for my back again. It will be a hassle to go to the hospital EVERY day again, but the final piece of the “back puzzle” should be complete after this.
I need to go to bed, so I will sign off.
Praise the Lord for his healing. Please pray for me that He will continue to heal me. We need to pray more than ever now knowing that it is working!
God bless you all,
Eric
For starters, the work situation has finally sorted itself out and we have some news that may be shocking: We are moving! After being in South Florida for almost 11 ½ years, my company is transferring us to Chicago. As of January 1, 2008, I will be the District Sales Manager of Chicago and Milwaukee areas (what comprises the “Chicago District”) for all of the sales functions: New Construction, Modernization and Service Sales.
We are very excited about this opportunity and the fact that we are returning home (but nowhere near as much as our parents are… especially my mom). We are also a bit nervous about the timing of a move given my treatments and what I am going through, but we feel strongly that God has a new season planned for us. He has always provided for this family in abundance and we know He will guide us through this, as well. We had turned this situation over to Him (and took it back many times, I promise you…) as much as any decision we ever have and have peace in it. We have already started working hard getting the house ready to show. And I’ll keep you updated on our house hunting.
Next up is the drama of last week…
The weekend was a full one. My brother, Scott, was visiting from Austin, TX, and Amy, mom and dad, were working hard on painting the kitchen cabinets and adding new door pulls, de-cluttering shelves, packing boxes to take to storage (to make the house seem bigger). On Sunday afternoon I was feeling good and helped reinstall door pulls and even installed a new cook top and was definitely pushing myself as far as I ever had with regard to bending over and working, but I truly needed to contribute. I was feeling emasculated just sitting on the couch all weekend while everyone else was working. Especially since so much of this stuff I have done in the past and even like to do… I went to bed Sunday feeling really tired but really good about finally contributing to the house prep.
Monday was an OK day physically and I was both excited and nervous about Tuesday a.m., when I would finally have my very first Aquatic Physical Therapy appointment, having had to cancel and postpone the first planned start after my last emergency hospital visit. Then Tuesday a.m. came and I awoke with a LOT of lower back pain on my lower left side. I probably should have stayed home, but I was determined NOT to miss this appointment. I went and told the therapist about the new low back pain and we went VERY easy. The appointment went awesome, but afterwards, the pain was now ramping up. I struggled home and couldn’t even get dressed. I lay in bed all day monitoring work via e-mail and phone and trying to use ice packs and pain meds to manage the pain that was still growing. By 5pm, I couldn’t get out of bed or even walk without Amy’s help. By 7pm, there was no way for me to lay, sit, or stand without pain, regardless of the amount of pain meds I took. It was frightening. Laying face down was the most comfortable I option I had. We decided to try to make it through the night then get admitted by my Doctor first thing, rather than go through another Emergency Room admission plan. See the 7/30/07 blog for how that route goes... The night was expectantly long, with me needing to use a make shift Gatorade Bottle urinal for my 60 minute interval pee schedule, but we got through it.
The next morning, the pain was the same and we struggled to my doctor’s office at 9:45am where we decided to do full scans to see what was going on with my back and check all of the tumors rather than wait until late November. We went to Admissions at 10:15am and I sat in a wheelchair until 12 noon, when they finally had a room ready for me. I then didn’t get any of the ordered pain meds until 1:30pm, which made only a small positive impact. The doctor then ordered a different pain med plan that the nurses didn’t get done before I had to go to “an MRI” scheduled for 3:30pm. My “an MRI” turned out to be three and I was in the machine for just under 2 hours. And yes it was the old one. Again. To her credit, Dr. Lozada had ordered an anesthesiologist to initiate “twilight” for me, but the guy never showed up. Again (second time). Fortunately, I was able to get through it with no meds and the pain was getting bearable. I think I can officially say that I have finally conquered my MRI claustrophobia.
From there I was wheeled to CT Scan where I waited for an hour in the hallway. I finally go back to my room around 7:30pm, where I got my first food since breakfast. At 8:30pm, I got a cell phone all from Dr. Lozada saying the scans showed two (2) pulmonary embolisms in the lungs (clots thrown from my legs) and this was an emergency situation and I needed surgery that night to install a filter in my main vein from the lower extremities to my torso. I guess you could say I literally dodged (2) bullets. A head or heart shot means stroke or death. Fun. I did finally get the pain med plan, a Delaudin pump, installed, and was finally able to lie on my back or right side comfortably. A HUGE improvement.
They then called in Dr. Tate and his team (he did the back surgery for me) at 9:30pm and I was wheeled back in my room at 11pm after yet another amazing go around with the technology they are using surgically… The filter is like an umbrella they guided up through my femoral vein and then expanded. This will catch any future clots. Plus I am now also on blood thinning meds, so right now I am the safest man on the planet with regard to protection from blood clots and pulmonary embolisms.
Now for the good news...
In all of this mayhem, Dr. Tate had reviewed the films of the scans and as able to tell us that there was a “substantial” reduction in the lung tumor mass!!! The other tumor sights also showed reductions AND there were no new tumors!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hallelujah!!!!!!!! Praise God!!!!!!! All of this #$%^&@ crap is working!!!! All of this hassle has meaning so far. I can’t tell you how very happy I am to report all of this.
The next day I found out the lung tumor is dying from the inside out, which is also another piece of good news, because that is apparently the way you want tumors to die.
So I did find out the back pain is being caused by the pesky tumor situated right on my sacroiliac joint (on the left side) and I needed to radiate it to kill it faster than the chemo would. The plan is to go back to radiation and chemo, and I will be doing 10-15 treatments for my back again. It will be a hassle to go to the hospital EVERY day again, but the final piece of the “back puzzle” should be complete after this.
I need to go to bed, so I will sign off.
Praise the Lord for his healing. Please pray for me that He will continue to heal me. We need to pray more than ever now knowing that it is working!
God bless you all,
Eric
Sunday, September 23, 2007
Halfway Done! 9/23/07
Hey everybody!
The last 2 weeks have been fairly uneventful. I had been off of chemo (till Friday) because of the low blood counts for the last two weeks and that may be why. Strangely, I still had a lot of down days/moments and that was both surprising and depressing. The nurses explained to me that the chemo stays in the system for weeks, so it isn’t like I can expect a plain, predictable improvement in the way I feel. They said once I finally stop, it can take “months” to actually feel normal again…. #$&*!…OK, so expectations get rearranged again… All that said, I did start Chemo back up again on Friday. I will be on a Friday on, Friday off regimen moving forward and then will do that until Thanksgiving, after which I will do full scans again to see where we are at with this.
We did go for a 2nd opinion that was set up by my doctor, to The UM Sylvester Cancer Canter at Jackson. We met with Dr. Gomez, there, and the visit was very successful. He basically completely validated my Oncology Team’s approach and he said that he doesn’t impress easy, but was VERY impressed with what Dr. Lozada had been doing for me. They will now collaborate with each other in the future and that makes my team that much stronger. There may also be the opportunity for me to join a vaccine trial but that pursuit is a ways off…
The bad news here is this was the first chemo treatment that hit me that same night. Fridays were usually a good night. This time I was exhausted Friday night and a zombie. The weekend was a better story and I guess that is a praise, because usually they are worse. I managed the nausea well and kept my appetite and eating up with small meals every 2 hours. I did watch a LOT of television/movies/etc and feel like a lazy porridge-head, but at least I am not throwing up… I gotta tell you the lack of consistency in how I feel with the treatments is driving me crazy.
The good news here is I only have (5) more chemo sessions until the scans. SO… I am actually over half done with the treatment.
This week should also sort out the future work situation I mentioned two blogs ago for my team and me. Meaning, we should finally hear where everybody will shake out position-wise and get closure on what our jobs will be as of January 1. Maybe then everyone can focus on the still chaotic current work load. I still need your all’s prayers about this.
This will be all for now. I will sign off asking for God’s blessing to be upon you all.
Love, In Christ,
Eric
The last 2 weeks have been fairly uneventful. I had been off of chemo (till Friday) because of the low blood counts for the last two weeks and that may be why. Strangely, I still had a lot of down days/moments and that was both surprising and depressing. The nurses explained to me that the chemo stays in the system for weeks, so it isn’t like I can expect a plain, predictable improvement in the way I feel. They said once I finally stop, it can take “months” to actually feel normal again…. #$&*!…OK, so expectations get rearranged again… All that said, I did start Chemo back up again on Friday. I will be on a Friday on, Friday off regimen moving forward and then will do that until Thanksgiving, after which I will do full scans again to see where we are at with this.
We did go for a 2nd opinion that was set up by my doctor, to The UM Sylvester Cancer Canter at Jackson. We met with Dr. Gomez, there, and the visit was very successful. He basically completely validated my Oncology Team’s approach and he said that he doesn’t impress easy, but was VERY impressed with what Dr. Lozada had been doing for me. They will now collaborate with each other in the future and that makes my team that much stronger. There may also be the opportunity for me to join a vaccine trial but that pursuit is a ways off…
The bad news here is this was the first chemo treatment that hit me that same night. Fridays were usually a good night. This time I was exhausted Friday night and a zombie. The weekend was a better story and I guess that is a praise, because usually they are worse. I managed the nausea well and kept my appetite and eating up with small meals every 2 hours. I did watch a LOT of television/movies/etc and feel like a lazy porridge-head, but at least I am not throwing up… I gotta tell you the lack of consistency in how I feel with the treatments is driving me crazy.
The good news here is I only have (5) more chemo sessions until the scans. SO… I am actually over half done with the treatment.
This week should also sort out the future work situation I mentioned two blogs ago for my team and me. Meaning, we should finally hear where everybody will shake out position-wise and get closure on what our jobs will be as of January 1. Maybe then everyone can focus on the still chaotic current work load. I still need your all’s prayers about this.
This will be all for now. I will sign off asking for God’s blessing to be upon you all.
Love, In Christ,
Eric
Sunday, September 9, 2007
In the hospital all week... 9/9/07
Hey all:
A quick update on things… Things have been a bit on the tough side this last week. I had some issues with limping on my right side on Wednesday, which when I called my Doctor, she said to get to the hospital to check out my back. That led to an MRI on my favorite machine (I did great this time. I think I am finally just learning to deal with it).
Unfortunately, my back had swelled up again and I need to go back on the Decadron steroid. (Not good news). The other down side is that while they were checking me for that, they tested my blood counts and found that they were so low across the board, that I needed to be hospitalized until they could be brought back up.
SO… I was actually in the hospital all week: Wednesday through today, Sunday afternoon. In addition to sitting around working (fortunately, or maybe unfortunately, the rooms all have Wi-Fi), they gave me shots, IV meds, and platelets and blood units, all trying to raise my counts. It was agonizing waiting for the lab results each day, hoping that they would get to the point that I could go home. Each day they bumped up, but not enough… Clearly, this last round of chemo really kicked my butt…
That and I think I overdid it at work the last two weeks. Especially Tuesday… I almost killed myself going down to one of the high-rise jobsites for a meeting. In full fall harness, I walked long distances, up stairs and ramps in 93 deg. heat. I completely soaked through my dress shirt in sweat. It was seriously stupid of me, but I had felt obligated to go. I won’t be doing anymore jobsite visits for a while, I can tell you that much. Obligation or not.
Anyway, I am home now and looking forward to getting a good night sleep in my own bed. I do have to go back and do blood work on Tuesday to make sure I am still fit to be in the general public.
Please pray that my blood counts stay up. I would also like to encourage you all to please go donate blood and platelets. When I donated, I never really thought much about who used that blood, guessing it was typically Emergency situations. But I clearly needed them to avoid any possible infection my body couldn’t then fight off. Or maybe I can just see it as they got me home to my family quicker? Saving lives in ER’s, or boosting cancer patients immune systems, or just getting people home quicker… All good reasons to donate.
Love, in Christ,
Eric
A quick update on things… Things have been a bit on the tough side this last week. I had some issues with limping on my right side on Wednesday, which when I called my Doctor, she said to get to the hospital to check out my back. That led to an MRI on my favorite machine (I did great this time. I think I am finally just learning to deal with it).
Unfortunately, my back had swelled up again and I need to go back on the Decadron steroid. (Not good news). The other down side is that while they were checking me for that, they tested my blood counts and found that they were so low across the board, that I needed to be hospitalized until they could be brought back up.
SO… I was actually in the hospital all week: Wednesday through today, Sunday afternoon. In addition to sitting around working (fortunately, or maybe unfortunately, the rooms all have Wi-Fi), they gave me shots, IV meds, and platelets and blood units, all trying to raise my counts. It was agonizing waiting for the lab results each day, hoping that they would get to the point that I could go home. Each day they bumped up, but not enough… Clearly, this last round of chemo really kicked my butt…
That and I think I overdid it at work the last two weeks. Especially Tuesday… I almost killed myself going down to one of the high-rise jobsites for a meeting. In full fall harness, I walked long distances, up stairs and ramps in 93 deg. heat. I completely soaked through my dress shirt in sweat. It was seriously stupid of me, but I had felt obligated to go. I won’t be doing anymore jobsite visits for a while, I can tell you that much. Obligation or not.
Anyway, I am home now and looking forward to getting a good night sleep in my own bed. I do have to go back and do blood work on Tuesday to make sure I am still fit to be in the general public.
Please pray that my blood counts stay up. I would also like to encourage you all to please go donate blood and platelets. When I donated, I never really thought much about who used that blood, guessing it was typically Emergency situations. But I clearly needed them to avoid any possible infection my body couldn’t then fight off. Or maybe I can just see it as they got me home to my family quicker? Saving lives in ER’s, or boosting cancer patients immune systems, or just getting people home quicker… All good reasons to donate.
Love, in Christ,
Eric
Sunday, September 2, 2007
Round 3: New Chemo Regimen - 9/2/07
Round 3: New Chemo Regimen
Hello everybody! I guess I lied again about blogging more frequently and I apologize. I will stop making promises for more frequent blogs so as to not keep having to apologize…
Things have been going really well since my last blog. Last week was both the end of Radiation treatment and a Chemo “bye week”. The prognosis of a good week last week was definitely expected and I can say that it was probably my strongest week since I started treatment. I basically really poured myself into work. I went into the Miami office and the Miami International Airport Office every day and basically worked very full days. There were client meetings, etc… I was always totally wiped out by the time I got home at night and ended up only able to sit in the recliner until bedtime, but felt that I had made some nice milestones. Honestly, I probably over did it, but I am still fully engaged at work and felt I needed to be able to do that since I have been working so remotely during the entire time I have been doing the radiation treatments.
Things are definitely still very hectic at work and I will ask you all to pray that God will help things settle down there. My team is really up to their eyeballs with the challenges we are facing each day, and we seriously have hit a patch of Murphy’s Law with regard to work issues that I have never seen before. It has me truly incredulous. And if it weren’t affecting the bottom line and my team’s morale so much, it would be almost laughable how almost everything that can go wrong has gone wrong. Not helping this is that everybody is also fighting hard not to be distracted by a major reorganization my company is going through right now. While we are going to be operating under our current structure though the rest of the year, this has many people not exactly knowing what their new roles or jobs may be as of January 1st. It is a serious stressor to all of us…
That aside, I can say that my company, my boss, former boss, and my team have been fantastic in their support of me during this time. They tell me not to even worry about work until I get through this treatment, but I can’t do that. That’s not how I’m wired… Fortunately, I can still work full time. I am not sure what I would do if I couldn’t. It would drive me crazy to just lay around.
But I definitely could use God’s intervention for some wins for my team!
As I had told you, Radiation treatment is done and so I don’t have that to deal with. This is seriously one of my happiest things to be able to say. It was a real pain in the you-know-what. Let me actually describe it to you…
I had to be at the hospital EVERY day, Monday through Friday, with a standing appointment that was “scheduled” for 9:30am. But one problem is the machine I was assigned to, I called her “Ole Bessie” was 16 years old and broke down a lot. There was always a 30-45 minute extra wait. More than a few times, they would come in at the end of a long delay and ask us all to come back in the afternoon. There were three times the machine broke down while I was in the middle of actually getting treatment… But I digress…
Here’s the base routine: I drive over there, park, walk in, sign in, and go directly to this one waiting room, where I wait with a bunch of very, very nice people who are also waiting for treatment. The waiting/changing room is usually about 69 deg. and everyone is huddled in gowns and blankets. You wait to until your name is called over the intercom, then you walk out to the “Accelerator Door” and walk down this semi-maze hallway into a room that is approximately 40’ x 40’, with this massive machine sticking out of one wall. Two very sweet ladies, Camile and Senilla, radiation techs, lay me face down on the table that sticks out of the wall under the big machine. They shift me around, pull me, push me, rotate me, etc… until my hips, legs, whatever are lined up with the laser guides just so, then tell me not to move. They vacate and then the machine starts to hum and move and rotate around me, every so often emitting an annoying buzz that indicates that it is zapping me with radiation. 30 minutes later, after my feet are numb and I am dying to itch my nose, the techs come back in and help me off the table.
One cool thing they did do was let me bring in any CD I wanted to listen to, but it was always hard to really enjoy it, given the intermittent buzzing which was louder than the music. But still, it was nice though to have that option. I always brought in praise music and used the time to pray. I started by praying to God to simply “Kill this cancer” every time the buzzer was buzzing, almost as a mantra. But after awhile, I tried to tune out the buzzer and just pray.
Last Friday marked the start Round 3 of my Chemo regimen… I can tell you that I am a little nervous about it. Just in how I am going to respond this week. Now that we are not doing the radiation anymore, we are upping the Chemo doses again, adding back the Gemzar drug to the mix with the Carboplatin and Taxol. Friday, my chemo day was a good one. They always are.
I also had the company of my best college friend, Greg Kroencke, who flew in late Friday night to spend some time with me. He hung with me all Saturday then flew out first thing Sunday morning, just to make a brief visit to me. It was so great to see him. We had a great time catching up and even got the special treat of watching the Illini do everything BUT win their first football game of the year (which was miraculously televised on ESPN2 since Illini Football is RARELY televised because they have been a terrible team for the last 6 years). We ran errands in the middle of the day and I was feeling really good until the evening. I got this amazing headache and lost my appetite for the first time in weeks. I couldn’t eat dinner and felt really poorly. I can honestly say it was my worst Saturday night since maybe the first Chemo weekend and a disappointing end of my time with Greg.
This morning, Sunday morning, Amy and I went to church and I have been feeling very uneven today. This is somewhat expected, though… Sundays have traditionally been my toughest day.
So… I will leave off here. Thanks again for the cards and e-mails.
Love, In Christ,
Eric
Hello everybody! I guess I lied again about blogging more frequently and I apologize. I will stop making promises for more frequent blogs so as to not keep having to apologize…
Things have been going really well since my last blog. Last week was both the end of Radiation treatment and a Chemo “bye week”. The prognosis of a good week last week was definitely expected and I can say that it was probably my strongest week since I started treatment. I basically really poured myself into work. I went into the Miami office and the Miami International Airport Office every day and basically worked very full days. There were client meetings, etc… I was always totally wiped out by the time I got home at night and ended up only able to sit in the recliner until bedtime, but felt that I had made some nice milestones. Honestly, I probably over did it, but I am still fully engaged at work and felt I needed to be able to do that since I have been working so remotely during the entire time I have been doing the radiation treatments.
Things are definitely still very hectic at work and I will ask you all to pray that God will help things settle down there. My team is really up to their eyeballs with the challenges we are facing each day, and we seriously have hit a patch of Murphy’s Law with regard to work issues that I have never seen before. It has me truly incredulous. And if it weren’t affecting the bottom line and my team’s morale so much, it would be almost laughable how almost everything that can go wrong has gone wrong. Not helping this is that everybody is also fighting hard not to be distracted by a major reorganization my company is going through right now. While we are going to be operating under our current structure though the rest of the year, this has many people not exactly knowing what their new roles or jobs may be as of January 1st. It is a serious stressor to all of us…
That aside, I can say that my company, my boss, former boss, and my team have been fantastic in their support of me during this time. They tell me not to even worry about work until I get through this treatment, but I can’t do that. That’s not how I’m wired… Fortunately, I can still work full time. I am not sure what I would do if I couldn’t. It would drive me crazy to just lay around.
But I definitely could use God’s intervention for some wins for my team!
As I had told you, Radiation treatment is done and so I don’t have that to deal with. This is seriously one of my happiest things to be able to say. It was a real pain in the you-know-what. Let me actually describe it to you…
I had to be at the hospital EVERY day, Monday through Friday, with a standing appointment that was “scheduled” for 9:30am. But one problem is the machine I was assigned to, I called her “Ole Bessie” was 16 years old and broke down a lot. There was always a 30-45 minute extra wait. More than a few times, they would come in at the end of a long delay and ask us all to come back in the afternoon. There were three times the machine broke down while I was in the middle of actually getting treatment… But I digress…
Here’s the base routine: I drive over there, park, walk in, sign in, and go directly to this one waiting room, where I wait with a bunch of very, very nice people who are also waiting for treatment. The waiting/changing room is usually about 69 deg. and everyone is huddled in gowns and blankets. You wait to until your name is called over the intercom, then you walk out to the “Accelerator Door” and walk down this semi-maze hallway into a room that is approximately 40’ x 40’, with this massive machine sticking out of one wall. Two very sweet ladies, Camile and Senilla, radiation techs, lay me face down on the table that sticks out of the wall under the big machine. They shift me around, pull me, push me, rotate me, etc… until my hips, legs, whatever are lined up with the laser guides just so, then tell me not to move. They vacate and then the machine starts to hum and move and rotate around me, every so often emitting an annoying buzz that indicates that it is zapping me with radiation. 30 minutes later, after my feet are numb and I am dying to itch my nose, the techs come back in and help me off the table.
One cool thing they did do was let me bring in any CD I wanted to listen to, but it was always hard to really enjoy it, given the intermittent buzzing which was louder than the music. But still, it was nice though to have that option. I always brought in praise music and used the time to pray. I started by praying to God to simply “Kill this cancer” every time the buzzer was buzzing, almost as a mantra. But after awhile, I tried to tune out the buzzer and just pray.
Last Friday marked the start Round 3 of my Chemo regimen… I can tell you that I am a little nervous about it. Just in how I am going to respond this week. Now that we are not doing the radiation anymore, we are upping the Chemo doses again, adding back the Gemzar drug to the mix with the Carboplatin and Taxol. Friday, my chemo day was a good one. They always are.
I also had the company of my best college friend, Greg Kroencke, who flew in late Friday night to spend some time with me. He hung with me all Saturday then flew out first thing Sunday morning, just to make a brief visit to me. It was so great to see him. We had a great time catching up and even got the special treat of watching the Illini do everything BUT win their first football game of the year (which was miraculously televised on ESPN2 since Illini Football is RARELY televised because they have been a terrible team for the last 6 years). We ran errands in the middle of the day and I was feeling really good until the evening. I got this amazing headache and lost my appetite for the first time in weeks. I couldn’t eat dinner and felt really poorly. I can honestly say it was my worst Saturday night since maybe the first Chemo weekend and a disappointing end of my time with Greg.
This morning, Sunday morning, Amy and I went to church and I have been feeling very uneven today. This is somewhat expected, though… Sundays have traditionally been my toughest day.
So… I will leave off here. Thanks again for the cards and e-mails.
Love, In Christ,
Eric
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
Back Surgery is a Success!!!!!!!! 8-22-07
Hey! I again don't know what to say about the delay in blogging except I can't even believe the gap. Sorry again, especially for those of you who check frequently. I will commit to writing far more frequently, although they will probably be shorter posts.
Tuesday I had my surgical procedure to "fix" the L3 vertebrate and can only characterize it as a success.
This involved a never been done in South Florida procedure, taking a tried and true procedure called a Vetribroplasty (don't think that is spelled right) and adding a new wrinkle specifically for cancerous damage to vertebrate pioneered in San Diego. The basic procedure basically shoves a huge needle into your vertebrate, then they pump cement into the gaps in the vertebrate. What I did adds a step where the dead cancer tissue from the Radiation is ablated by a radio frequency "wand", eliminating far more soft tissue material and reducing the risk of the cement pushing the dead tissue material into the spinal cavity.
The doctor, Dr. Tate, later that afternoon presented my operation in a presentation to the entire Cancer Center Medical staff to a standing ovation!
All of that celebrating aside, there was a small complication during the procedure. While they were filling the vertebrate with structural epoxy cement, I had a minor heart arrhythmia on the table.
So..... More nights in the hospital for Eric. They kept me in Tuesday for some EKG's, blood tests, an Wednesday for Echocardiogram, and a stress test. We didn't get the stress test results back by 6pm, so he I sit on a Wednesday night, blogging to you from a hospital bed.
Obviously there's a lot of reasons why that could have happened (oh... Radiation, Chemotherapy, Job Stress, Life Stress, I was having surgery, are a few that come to mind)... The head of cardiology is feeling like it was probably a one off thing, but Dr. Lozada (my oncologist and lead doc) is very conservative. The Taxol chemo can be hard on hearts, so she wants all the results back before discharging me. I expect that will be sometime just after lunch.
Anyway, I am not worried about it and am in great spirits over the back. I can already tell I have more mobility and can move much easier.
If I can only get my back to feel back like it was pre-diagnosis, I would be in such good shape with all of this. It also means I can scuttle that back brace.
With the exception of Sunday a.m. my past week has been great. And even with all of the surgery excitement, I have been doing very well feeling wise.
More good news to report: I only have (2) (read it! 2) more radiation therapies. that means no more going to the hospital EVERY day. And i can cut out a major side effect generator. No it may take 4 weeks for the side effects to subside, but at least the line is no in the sand and it is Friday.
Friday is also my "bye-week" for Chemo, so next week is my rest week - and without radiation treatment.
I am hoping that it will be a high watermark in how I am feeling during all of this treatment. The Friday after that, I go back to a chemo only regimen and we bring back the Gemzar in to the mix.
Thanks for the continued e-mails and prayers!
Love, in Christ,
Eric
Tuesday I had my surgical procedure to "fix" the L3 vertebrate and can only characterize it as a success.
This involved a never been done in South Florida procedure, taking a tried and true procedure called a Vetribroplasty (don't think that is spelled right) and adding a new wrinkle specifically for cancerous damage to vertebrate pioneered in San Diego. The basic procedure basically shoves a huge needle into your vertebrate, then they pump cement into the gaps in the vertebrate. What I did adds a step where the dead cancer tissue from the Radiation is ablated by a radio frequency "wand", eliminating far more soft tissue material and reducing the risk of the cement pushing the dead tissue material into the spinal cavity.
The doctor, Dr. Tate, later that afternoon presented my operation in a presentation to the entire Cancer Center Medical staff to a standing ovation!
All of that celebrating aside, there was a small complication during the procedure. While they were filling the vertebrate with structural epoxy cement, I had a minor heart arrhythmia on the table.
So..... More nights in the hospital for Eric. They kept me in Tuesday for some EKG's, blood tests, an Wednesday for Echocardiogram, and a stress test. We didn't get the stress test results back by 6pm, so he I sit on a Wednesday night, blogging to you from a hospital bed.
Obviously there's a lot of reasons why that could have happened (oh... Radiation, Chemotherapy, Job Stress, Life Stress, I was having surgery, are a few that come to mind)... The head of cardiology is feeling like it was probably a one off thing, but Dr. Lozada (my oncologist and lead doc) is very conservative. The Taxol chemo can be hard on hearts, so she wants all the results back before discharging me. I expect that will be sometime just after lunch.
Anyway, I am not worried about it and am in great spirits over the back. I can already tell I have more mobility and can move much easier.
If I can only get my back to feel back like it was pre-diagnosis, I would be in such good shape with all of this. It also means I can scuttle that back brace.
With the exception of Sunday a.m. my past week has been great. And even with all of the surgery excitement, I have been doing very well feeling wise.
More good news to report: I only have (2) (read it! 2) more radiation therapies. that means no more going to the hospital EVERY day. And i can cut out a major side effect generator. No it may take 4 weeks for the side effects to subside, but at least the line is no in the sand and it is Friday.
Friday is also my "bye-week" for Chemo, so next week is my rest week - and without radiation treatment.
I am hoping that it will be a high watermark in how I am feeling during all of this treatment. The Friday after that, I go back to a chemo only regimen and we bring back the Gemzar in to the mix.
Thanks for the continued e-mails and prayers!
Love, in Christ,
Eric
Friday, August 10, 2007
8/10/07 Update (a.k.a. the least creative title in blog history)
8/10/07 Update (a.k.a. the least creative title in blog history)
Hard to believe another week has gone by without a posting… Time seems like it is both frozen and on fast-forward.
I had an uneven week. My previous experiences have been something linear and positively progressing. Meaning, that I have chemo on Fridays, which since progressively each day has been better than the next, it is usually going to be my best day. Saturday seems to hold court with no real improvement, but I slow way down by night time. Then the chemo catches up and Sunday is usually the worst day. Followed by Monday, a little better, then each day better yet.
This last week was different; and in a very real sense disappointing. Only because it was different. More fatigue in general is the culprit. Typically, Sunday held up as a bad day. Monday was actually pretty good. Tuesday, I backslid big time. But then Wednesday was pretty strong. Thursday was up and down. My nights were all pretty tough. I had major appetite issues and low grade nausea. Today, Chemo day, was a good day. And strangely, wonderfully, I can actually say as I write this very text, this is the best I have felt since I took my first Chemo. I even feel normal!!! Let’s pray this holds up!
I think I need to chalk up the week’s unevenness to the fact I had BOTH Chemo and a lot of radiation. My nurses told me “it will be butt-kicking”… The other good news is that I am done with the first radiation field at L3. But the remaining radiation is substantial and I am assuming that the fatigue will remain an issue for at least the next 2 weeks while I get this next large field addressed. The radiologist says fatigue onset can remain for 4 weeks past completion. OH well. Either way, the period is finite. And I am not an 80 year old lady.
It looks like I do need to do the reconstructive surgery on my back to ensure stability at L3. This would require and outpatient procedure may be as soon as THIS NEXT WEEK. There is obviously risk with any procedure you do, but one of the issues is paralysis and I am nervous about it. Doing nothing is also a risky option. We will be praying about that a lot this weekend and early week. Please pray about that was well. And this can’t help the fatigue story can it?
By the way, I love your e-mails and cards. Thank you all for sending them. I type very slow, so I have not been the best a returning all of them. Please accept this note as a heartfelt thanks for your thoughtfulness.
And honestly, you all have blown me away really. It has been amazing how many people from High school and College have gotten word and reached out. Your kind comments have frequently moved me to tears. (Yes, I am vastly more emotional lately – my Pastor told me that this was a good thing and not to fight it). I wish we had stayed in better touch.
But, one obvious blessing in all of this is that I am catching up with so many of you. I hope we can continue that.
I’d like to encourage you all to read Psalm 30 and Psalm 40. Two more Psalms that I have clung to recently.
From Psalm 40: Be pleased, oh Lord, to save me. Oh lord, come quickly to help me. I say this passage a lot, especially while laying on the radiation table.
May god bless you all richly and give you all peace that can only come from Him, so that you will all know who much we are all loved.
Love, in Christ,
Eric
P.S. For those of you who know him, Chris Pottorff and his new bride Carrie, have flown in just to hang for the weekend. He has been a dear friend from Junior H.S. on… A real blessing to have them, here!!!
Hard to believe another week has gone by without a posting… Time seems like it is both frozen and on fast-forward.
I had an uneven week. My previous experiences have been something linear and positively progressing. Meaning, that I have chemo on Fridays, which since progressively each day has been better than the next, it is usually going to be my best day. Saturday seems to hold court with no real improvement, but I slow way down by night time. Then the chemo catches up and Sunday is usually the worst day. Followed by Monday, a little better, then each day better yet.
This last week was different; and in a very real sense disappointing. Only because it was different. More fatigue in general is the culprit. Typically, Sunday held up as a bad day. Monday was actually pretty good. Tuesday, I backslid big time. But then Wednesday was pretty strong. Thursday was up and down. My nights were all pretty tough. I had major appetite issues and low grade nausea. Today, Chemo day, was a good day. And strangely, wonderfully, I can actually say as I write this very text, this is the best I have felt since I took my first Chemo. I even feel normal!!! Let’s pray this holds up!
I think I need to chalk up the week’s unevenness to the fact I had BOTH Chemo and a lot of radiation. My nurses told me “it will be butt-kicking”… The other good news is that I am done with the first radiation field at L3. But the remaining radiation is substantial and I am assuming that the fatigue will remain an issue for at least the next 2 weeks while I get this next large field addressed. The radiologist says fatigue onset can remain for 4 weeks past completion. OH well. Either way, the period is finite. And I am not an 80 year old lady.
It looks like I do need to do the reconstructive surgery on my back to ensure stability at L3. This would require and outpatient procedure may be as soon as THIS NEXT WEEK. There is obviously risk with any procedure you do, but one of the issues is paralysis and I am nervous about it. Doing nothing is also a risky option. We will be praying about that a lot this weekend and early week. Please pray about that was well. And this can’t help the fatigue story can it?
By the way, I love your e-mails and cards. Thank you all for sending them. I type very slow, so I have not been the best a returning all of them. Please accept this note as a heartfelt thanks for your thoughtfulness.
And honestly, you all have blown me away really. It has been amazing how many people from High school and College have gotten word and reached out. Your kind comments have frequently moved me to tears. (Yes, I am vastly more emotional lately – my Pastor told me that this was a good thing and not to fight it). I wish we had stayed in better touch.
But, one obvious blessing in all of this is that I am catching up with so many of you. I hope we can continue that.
I’d like to encourage you all to read Psalm 30 and Psalm 40. Two more Psalms that I have clung to recently.
From Psalm 40: Be pleased, oh Lord, to save me. Oh lord, come quickly to help me. I say this passage a lot, especially while laying on the radiation table.
May god bless you all richly and give you all peace that can only come from Him, so that you will all know who much we are all loved.
Love, in Christ,
Eric
P.S. For those of you who know him, Chris Pottorff and his new bride Carrie, have flown in just to hang for the weekend. He has been a dear friend from Junior H.S. on… A real blessing to have them, here!!!
Saturday, August 4, 2007
Good News Plus More Plan Changes… 8/4/07
Good News Plus More Plan Changes… 8/4/07
Hello! Sorry for the downbeat/mood of my last blog. This one will not be near so glum. Promise. I actually am feeling pretty good right now so I felt this would be a good time to catch you all up.
This week marked my 1st full week of radiation therapy at my L3 site. I feel it must be considered successful. My pain has greatly diminished and I am really only left with the great inconvenience of wearing a full chest brace to try to support/isolate that L3, to be worn all the time when I am not sleeping. The doctors think I may need to wear this for a pretty long time, not knowing ho truly unstable the L3 is. I am hoping we’ll have a plan in the next 4 weeks on whether I need the Kyphoplasty/Arcuplasty treatment to repair the L3, with surgical cement. We’ll just have to wait on that.
The only real side effect I have been fighting this week that may be new and/or increased is substantial fatigue. I get weak fast. I definitely think it is a combined factor of both the Chemo and the Radiation (most people do not do both at the same time).
Throw in the MISERABLE weekend stay at Holy Cross and that I am still not sleeping soundly at night and most of this is explainable… The good news is that I think I am finally pulling through on the rest front. I have caught a few naps this week and feel less fatigued today since I have since all of last week. I plan to take this weekend to really gain on my rest and feel like I can come close to square one and really try to get to an understanding of my “baseline” feelings.
And this has been my main frustration so far. All of this is new. All of this is changing, literally weekly, that I have yet be able to find a “rhythm”. And with all of the treatment changes we are still talking about, it may be a few more weeks before I get a stable routine going. Now, enough about that. Here’s the latest:
PLAN CHANGES
I had Chemotherapy again yesterday. My new cycle will be (3) straight Friday’s, then a “bye week”. But the chemo will be a fractionated dose of just the Taxol and Carboplatin (Gemzar is too sensitive to radiation, so we had to cut that out completely). This chemo plan is really just to make sure we can keep some momentum up on that front as I switch to more of a radiation therapy plan. Plus I am young and they think I can take this more aggressive plan.
I will keep up with the Monday through Friday radiation of the site at L3, PLUS I will start an additional, lager field regimen of Radiation Therapy for my hips, and sacrum on Monday. This too, will be every weekday and we expect this to go for another 3-4weeks. This ties into the Chemo cycle, and so I will guess we will be changing that plan again then, too…
Dr. Lozada ordered a CT Scan on Thursday wanting to see what my lung tumor has been doing with the chemo. We were a little tentative about what we would find, as the first scan was from 2+ weeks before treatment started, so the growth was still theoretically blooming and we feared that the new scan might come back showing an increase.
But, GOOD NEWS!!! The scan actually shows a slight decrease in size after only one cycle. Praise God! A small victory for sure, but a victory none-the-less.
With that news above, and now that we have switched to a radiation heavy plan, Dr. Lozada is asking the Radiation Oncologist, Dr. Medina, to look to radiate the lung to really go aggressively after this stuff. Dr. Medina is slightly tentative because this would be (3) very large fields of radiation all going on at the same time, but again, I am young and strong and Dr. Lozada seems encouraged. I’ll know more on that next week…
Oh yeah, I am completely bald now. I have also lost a bunch of weight (20 lbs+), eating healthier than I have in my entire life tehse last 4 weeks. When you don’t eat a bunch of crap, it is actually a major struggle to get 2000 calories a day… Funny, I don’t miss any of it.
I will get pictures up soon so you call can see my new “look”. I still feel like I am looking at a stranger in the mirror, but some people have been nice enough to say that I look handsome. I am also not getting my beard growth back either. I shaved the other week and with 5 days growth since, I still only look like a 13 year old kid trying to look like a Latino gang banger…
Still constipated. Think about that a lot. Really hate that. Bowels should not be a part of your moment-to-moment consciousness. I am trying to turn it over to God (add your own “moving in mysterious ways” jokes, here).
Anyway, I will sign off. Thanks so much for you continued e-mails and prayers. I love you all.
Eric
Hello! Sorry for the downbeat/mood of my last blog. This one will not be near so glum. Promise. I actually am feeling pretty good right now so I felt this would be a good time to catch you all up.
This week marked my 1st full week of radiation therapy at my L3 site. I feel it must be considered successful. My pain has greatly diminished and I am really only left with the great inconvenience of wearing a full chest brace to try to support/isolate that L3, to be worn all the time when I am not sleeping. The doctors think I may need to wear this for a pretty long time, not knowing ho truly unstable the L3 is. I am hoping we’ll have a plan in the next 4 weeks on whether I need the Kyphoplasty/Arcuplasty treatment to repair the L3, with surgical cement. We’ll just have to wait on that.
The only real side effect I have been fighting this week that may be new and/or increased is substantial fatigue. I get weak fast. I definitely think it is a combined factor of both the Chemo and the Radiation (most people do not do both at the same time).
Throw in the MISERABLE weekend stay at Holy Cross and that I am still not sleeping soundly at night and most of this is explainable… The good news is that I think I am finally pulling through on the rest front. I have caught a few naps this week and feel less fatigued today since I have since all of last week. I plan to take this weekend to really gain on my rest and feel like I can come close to square one and really try to get to an understanding of my “baseline” feelings.
And this has been my main frustration so far. All of this is new. All of this is changing, literally weekly, that I have yet be able to find a “rhythm”. And with all of the treatment changes we are still talking about, it may be a few more weeks before I get a stable routine going. Now, enough about that. Here’s the latest:
PLAN CHANGES
I had Chemotherapy again yesterday. My new cycle will be (3) straight Friday’s, then a “bye week”. But the chemo will be a fractionated dose of just the Taxol and Carboplatin (Gemzar is too sensitive to radiation, so we had to cut that out completely). This chemo plan is really just to make sure we can keep some momentum up on that front as I switch to more of a radiation therapy plan. Plus I am young and they think I can take this more aggressive plan.
I will keep up with the Monday through Friday radiation of the site at L3, PLUS I will start an additional, lager field regimen of Radiation Therapy for my hips, and sacrum on Monday. This too, will be every weekday and we expect this to go for another 3-4weeks. This ties into the Chemo cycle, and so I will guess we will be changing that plan again then, too…
Dr. Lozada ordered a CT Scan on Thursday wanting to see what my lung tumor has been doing with the chemo. We were a little tentative about what we would find, as the first scan was from 2+ weeks before treatment started, so the growth was still theoretically blooming and we feared that the new scan might come back showing an increase.
But, GOOD NEWS!!! The scan actually shows a slight decrease in size after only one cycle. Praise God! A small victory for sure, but a victory none-the-less.
With that news above, and now that we have switched to a radiation heavy plan, Dr. Lozada is asking the Radiation Oncologist, Dr. Medina, to look to radiate the lung to really go aggressively after this stuff. Dr. Medina is slightly tentative because this would be (3) very large fields of radiation all going on at the same time, but again, I am young and strong and Dr. Lozada seems encouraged. I’ll know more on that next week…
Oh yeah, I am completely bald now. I have also lost a bunch of weight (20 lbs+), eating healthier than I have in my entire life tehse last 4 weeks. When you don’t eat a bunch of crap, it is actually a major struggle to get 2000 calories a day… Funny, I don’t miss any of it.
I will get pictures up soon so you call can see my new “look”. I still feel like I am looking at a stranger in the mirror, but some people have been nice enough to say that I look handsome. I am also not getting my beard growth back either. I shaved the other week and with 5 days growth since, I still only look like a 13 year old kid trying to look like a Latino gang banger…
Still constipated. Think about that a lot. Really hate that. Bowels should not be a part of your moment-to-moment consciousness. I am trying to turn it over to God (add your own “moving in mysterious ways” jokes, here).
Anyway, I will sign off. Thanks so much for you continued e-mails and prayers. I love you all.
Eric
Monday, July 30, 2007
A Minor Setback... 7/30/07
A Minor Setback…
Sorry for the delay between postings. I actually have not been doing so hot, and wasn’t really motivated to write you all about that…
Last Wednesday was actually a pretty good day and I was really looking forward to building on that. But Thursday came and I threw my back out. I probably stupidly went to work anyway and toughed though the day. I finally couldn’t see straight through the pain and drove home, with just the simple lifting of my legs to operate the pedals almost more than I could take. I got home went to bed, iced my back and realized that I had maxed out my pain meds and still could not find relief; Time to call Nurse Kathy (the awesome nurse to my oncologist, Dr. Lozada). She said to go to the ER that this wasn’t good. That they’d order an MRI for me. I knew she was going to say this, but I literally broke down and wept at that, because that meant 3-4 hours sitting and waiting in the waiting room (sitting is not a good option for me in this state), plus I dread the MRI. I am highly claustrophobic and the ancient ER MRI and I have tangled in the past. It is an old fashioned one, only goes head in first, and I barely fit in it, eliciting horrific thoughts of entombing/entrapment/etc… The last time it took 4 tries to get me in that MRI machine and tons of prayer for courage. Needless to say, I was not happy about going. I calmed down through much prayer and left with Amy around 5:00pm.
We sat in the waiting room for 2 hours, but fortunately Nurse Kathy instructed them to get me to a gurney after triage saw me. I then lay there until 9:30pm when they wheeled me down to the MRI. I got in on one try (with the aid of some anti-anxiety meds), and did two full scans, one without and one with contrast dye (total in the machine time: about an hour). I then lay back on my gurney until 3:30am. It was how long it took for a radiologist to read it and tell us the report of a fractured L3. I was admitted to the hospital at 4:00am…
SO… Friday and the weekend sucked. Especially in light of my hopes of the continued improvement I was expecting. This was a definite setback.
But like all things, when you get knocked down, you gotta get back up. Walter Payton, the greatest running back ever to play the game is my inspiration. He ran for something like 16,500 yards in his career. That is over 10 miles of running with the ball. But the really impressive point to this was his persistence. He “only” averaged around 4 yards a carry (that is a fantastic yards per carry…). That meant, the whole time while he ran hard for those 10 miles, a group of big angry guys, all trying to stop/hurt him, tackled him to the ground every 12 feet… You gotta get back up…
That is what I am trying to do here. Every setback. Get back up, get going. This is what you can pray for me at this reading.
And I see this focus change to radiation therapy as a side step at worst in my treatment plan. Obviously we wished we could have avoided it, but simply need to address this issue for a bit…. So as not to lose momentum on the chemo, I will continue light doses of chemo on Fridays.
And this might actually be a blessing in disguise… Because one real important thing to consider is that we are taking it right to the tumors now. Killing them even more directly. There is great satisfaction in that and the doctors think my back pain should greatly diminish over the next few weeks. PRAY FOR THAT!!! ☺
And the fight goes on.
Thanks so very much for your continued prayers. I love you all.
Eric
Sorry for the delay between postings. I actually have not been doing so hot, and wasn’t really motivated to write you all about that…
Last Wednesday was actually a pretty good day and I was really looking forward to building on that. But Thursday came and I threw my back out. I probably stupidly went to work anyway and toughed though the day. I finally couldn’t see straight through the pain and drove home, with just the simple lifting of my legs to operate the pedals almost more than I could take. I got home went to bed, iced my back and realized that I had maxed out my pain meds and still could not find relief; Time to call Nurse Kathy (the awesome nurse to my oncologist, Dr. Lozada). She said to go to the ER that this wasn’t good. That they’d order an MRI for me. I knew she was going to say this, but I literally broke down and wept at that, because that meant 3-4 hours sitting and waiting in the waiting room (sitting is not a good option for me in this state), plus I dread the MRI. I am highly claustrophobic and the ancient ER MRI and I have tangled in the past. It is an old fashioned one, only goes head in first, and I barely fit in it, eliciting horrific thoughts of entombing/entrapment/etc… The last time it took 4 tries to get me in that MRI machine and tons of prayer for courage. Needless to say, I was not happy about going. I calmed down through much prayer and left with Amy around 5:00pm.
We sat in the waiting room for 2 hours, but fortunately Nurse Kathy instructed them to get me to a gurney after triage saw me. I then lay there until 9:30pm when they wheeled me down to the MRI. I got in on one try (with the aid of some anti-anxiety meds), and did two full scans, one without and one with contrast dye (total in the machine time: about an hour). I then lay back on my gurney until 3:30am. It was how long it took for a radiologist to read it and tell us the report of a fractured L3. I was admitted to the hospital at 4:00am…
SO… Friday and the weekend sucked. Especially in light of my hopes of the continued improvement I was expecting. This was a definite setback.
But like all things, when you get knocked down, you gotta get back up. Walter Payton, the greatest running back ever to play the game is my inspiration. He ran for something like 16,500 yards in his career. That is over 10 miles of running with the ball. But the really impressive point to this was his persistence. He “only” averaged around 4 yards a carry (that is a fantastic yards per carry…). That meant, the whole time while he ran hard for those 10 miles, a group of big angry guys, all trying to stop/hurt him, tackled him to the ground every 12 feet… You gotta get back up…
That is what I am trying to do here. Every setback. Get back up, get going. This is what you can pray for me at this reading.
And I see this focus change to radiation therapy as a side step at worst in my treatment plan. Obviously we wished we could have avoided it, but simply need to address this issue for a bit…. So as not to lose momentum on the chemo, I will continue light doses of chemo on Fridays.
And this might actually be a blessing in disguise… Because one real important thing to consider is that we are taking it right to the tumors now. Killing them even more directly. There is great satisfaction in that and the doctors think my back pain should greatly diminish over the next few weeks. PRAY FOR THAT!!! ☺
And the fight goes on.
Thanks so very much for your continued prayers. I love you all.
Eric
Friday, July 20, 2007
Ding! Ding! Round Two!!! ...7/20/07
Ding! Ding! Round Two!!!
Round 1 wraps up…
****WARNING**** SOME OF THE CONTENT IN THIS BLOG IS REALLY QUITE GROSS – DEFINITELY LANDING IN THE “TOO MUCH INFORMATION CATEGORY” FOR THE CASUAL READER (AND I CAN’T BELIEVE I AM WRITING THIS, BUT I FEEL I MUST MAINTAIN MY JOURNALISTIC CREDIBILITY. THAT AND THERE MUST CERTAINLY BE SOME BLOGGER CODE OUT THAT PROBABLY SAYS WE MUST BEAR ALL SHAME).
Today was a good day. I steadily improved each day from Sunday, with Thursday and today almost approaching me feeling normal. Maybe it would be better said that I had multiple moments of normalcy (plus that sounds far more eloquent….). I am still bothered by three new annoyances that are surely by-products of the Chemo…
My bowels are totally out of whack. (TOLD YOU…) Pain meds and the chemo bound me up like never been seen, from Friday last week through Wednesday, then my extensive laxative, stool softening, and fiber plan, in full effect since Saturday, finally blew the lid off the fountain. So Wednesday and Thursday, I had the exact opposite problem, running for the can with a 20 second window at the first rumble in the gut. So Thursday night I go so far as to take Immodium ID. I now have not moved a bowl again since. CRRRRAP! (Read with a Scottish accent, always funny; and also enjoy the pun) Joking aside: This has been pure misery. And I am still trying to dial this in.
I still had many moments of what must be low grade anxiety – There are times at night and first thing in the morning where I can’t really focus some of the time and am not sleeping more than an hour at a pop without waking up briefly. It must be what having a severe case of ADD or ADHD is like. My mind just runs, but all over and around. But not in a focused direction. This seems to have incrementally improved though to now. I hope that that will remain the case. Unfortunately, the nurses say this is common enough to have gotten a cute name: “Chemo Brain”. I hope I can fully shake that but fear that will be a 1st 4 day thing for each cycle. They did just give me Adavan for this and I hope that it will clear it up chemically.
Sleep... Good sleep alludes me. This last Sunday-Monday night was the worst night in my entire life. 8-20 minutes of sleep at a crack. Wake up. Stare at clock. Want to swear it has not moved more than 10 minutes. Wash. Rinse. Repeat. From 8:30pm to 7am. This is no exaggeration. Plus three dozen fruitless trips to the can; Trying for anything. No, can’t forget those... They were like doing a squat work-out with free weights. The next day my highs and knees were sore in addition to the back and hip…
But, I have hopes that I can dial all of these issue in to a manageable routine and I am officially scoring Round one….. It goes to……… Eric! Judges cards: 10-9, 10-9, 10-9.
Round 2 Starts
Today, Friday saw the beginning of Chemo Round #2. But I only got the Gemzar today (last round had a cocktail of Gemzar + Taxol + Carboplatin). I will get a Nuelasta shot tomorrow for the extra production of my bone marrow to start. The “expected” side effects for this round are not pleasant, but I believe the can be very manageable. Again, I fear that this will be a learning cycle, and will require “dialing in”… I will keep you all posted.
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE keep your prayers rolling in. I can feel them and God answers prayers!!!
Love, in Christ, Eric Plummer
PS. Psalm 86 gave me great comfort on Wednesday night. Open your bible (or go find one – EVERY house has one). Please check it out Pray and meditate over it for me!!
Round 1 wraps up…
****WARNING**** SOME OF THE CONTENT IN THIS BLOG IS REALLY QUITE GROSS – DEFINITELY LANDING IN THE “TOO MUCH INFORMATION CATEGORY” FOR THE CASUAL READER (AND I CAN’T BELIEVE I AM WRITING THIS, BUT I FEEL I MUST MAINTAIN MY JOURNALISTIC CREDIBILITY. THAT AND THERE MUST CERTAINLY BE SOME BLOGGER CODE OUT THAT PROBABLY SAYS WE MUST BEAR ALL SHAME).
Today was a good day. I steadily improved each day from Sunday, with Thursday and today almost approaching me feeling normal. Maybe it would be better said that I had multiple moments of normalcy (plus that sounds far more eloquent….). I am still bothered by three new annoyances that are surely by-products of the Chemo…
My bowels are totally out of whack. (TOLD YOU…) Pain meds and the chemo bound me up like never been seen, from Friday last week through Wednesday, then my extensive laxative, stool softening, and fiber plan, in full effect since Saturday, finally blew the lid off the fountain. So Wednesday and Thursday, I had the exact opposite problem, running for the can with a 20 second window at the first rumble in the gut. So Thursday night I go so far as to take Immodium ID. I now have not moved a bowl again since. CRRRRAP! (Read with a Scottish accent, always funny; and also enjoy the pun) Joking aside: This has been pure misery. And I am still trying to dial this in.
I still had many moments of what must be low grade anxiety – There are times at night and first thing in the morning where I can’t really focus some of the time and am not sleeping more than an hour at a pop without waking up briefly. It must be what having a severe case of ADD or ADHD is like. My mind just runs, but all over and around. But not in a focused direction. This seems to have incrementally improved though to now. I hope that that will remain the case. Unfortunately, the nurses say this is common enough to have gotten a cute name: “Chemo Brain”. I hope I can fully shake that but fear that will be a 1st 4 day thing for each cycle. They did just give me Adavan for this and I hope that it will clear it up chemically.
Sleep... Good sleep alludes me. This last Sunday-Monday night was the worst night in my entire life. 8-20 minutes of sleep at a crack. Wake up. Stare at clock. Want to swear it has not moved more than 10 minutes. Wash. Rinse. Repeat. From 8:30pm to 7am. This is no exaggeration. Plus three dozen fruitless trips to the can; Trying for anything. No, can’t forget those... They were like doing a squat work-out with free weights. The next day my highs and knees were sore in addition to the back and hip…
But, I have hopes that I can dial all of these issue in to a manageable routine and I am officially scoring Round one….. It goes to……… Eric! Judges cards: 10-9, 10-9, 10-9.
Round 2 Starts
Today, Friday saw the beginning of Chemo Round #2. But I only got the Gemzar today (last round had a cocktail of Gemzar + Taxol + Carboplatin). I will get a Nuelasta shot tomorrow for the extra production of my bone marrow to start. The “expected” side effects for this round are not pleasant, but I believe the can be very manageable. Again, I fear that this will be a learning cycle, and will require “dialing in”… I will keep you all posted.
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE keep your prayers rolling in. I can feel them and God answers prayers!!!
Love, in Christ, Eric Plummer
PS. Psalm 86 gave me great comfort on Wednesday night. Open your bible (or go find one – EVERY house has one). Please check it out Pray and meditate over it for me!!
Sunday, July 15, 2007
The battle has begun....7/15/07
Well... sorry for the delay in between blogs. I am pretty tired right now but can happiily say that the battle has begun. I have started to fight back!
Friday's chemo day was uneventful and Saturday was a tired day snoozing in bed most of the day. I claimed the first two days of battle as mine. Today, Sunday, has been tough. Rough nausea and vomiting in the morning and can't seem to get feeling right. I just showered and decided to try to blog some of my stupor away. It does seem to be working.
I have decided to occaisionally talk to my cacner. Like when I asked it how this chemo was treating it. I imagained a responses in a thousand tiny little voices: "What the f#@$!!!" When the attack started! :)
I can admit to you all that I am worried about how I am going to react during all the chemo. Today has been discouraging and I can't even imagine I have seen anything close to the level of nausea, pain and discomfort that I will eventually see over the course of the coming cycles. I hope I can be up and about, be a good father, and be productive at work.
I can also admit that I have been narrow in my prayers. They have been all for me and helpng me feel better today and through this ordeal. I will be spedning time thanking God for all of you right after I post this.
Keep me in your thoughts and prayer! Ask that our Lord, will reach out with his healing touch to comfort and strengthen me during this time.
More later... Love, Eric
Friday's chemo day was uneventful and Saturday was a tired day snoozing in bed most of the day. I claimed the first two days of battle as mine. Today, Sunday, has been tough. Rough nausea and vomiting in the morning and can't seem to get feeling right. I just showered and decided to try to blog some of my stupor away. It does seem to be working.
I have decided to occaisionally talk to my cacner. Like when I asked it how this chemo was treating it. I imagained a responses in a thousand tiny little voices: "What the f#@$!!!" When the attack started! :)
I can admit to you all that I am worried about how I am going to react during all the chemo. Today has been discouraging and I can't even imagine I have seen anything close to the level of nausea, pain and discomfort that I will eventually see over the course of the coming cycles. I hope I can be up and about, be a good father, and be productive at work.
I can also admit that I have been narrow in my prayers. They have been all for me and helpng me feel better today and through this ordeal. I will be spedning time thanking God for all of you right after I post this.
Keep me in your thoughts and prayer! Ask that our Lord, will reach out with his healing touch to comfort and strengthen me during this time.
More later... Love, Eric
Thursday, July 5, 2007
Thinking in the Now (7/4/07)
It is funny how much a difference a day or two can
make in your entire outlook on life. My entire adult life has been spent
planning on what was next. Not something as mundane as my next meal or what to
do the next day; nothing like that…
I have always focused my dreaming, thinking and
planning on mid- to long-term things: My next professional goal, my next
personal goal, my next financial goal, my next parental goal/milestone, next
car I want to drive, next large project around the house, next guitar I will
buy, where I want to live next, where I want to retire to, what kind and when
I’ll get a toy car to goof around with, future hobbies I want to take on (as
if I didn’t have enough already). These are all months, years, and decades
away from becoming a reality, but I thought about each of those things almost
as if I needed to be prepared in case there was ever a giant pop quiz sprung
on me. Because then I’d be prepared to explain all of my dreams in an
organized and thoughtful way... Ha!
I also spent time thinking about the past. I
enjoyed reminiscing on the countless pleasant memories I have from childhood,
school years, and adult life. I don’t even mind the occasional recollection of
the less pleasant ones, assuming I was able to learn from those mistakes… I
can also say that I have very few regrets. And of those few that I do have,
they don’t seem to have left any permanent damage (at least not any that I am
aware of) …
But for almost the first two weeks after finding
out that I had cancer, I stopping thinking about anything other than right
now. That is sobering: Not being able to think about anything other than
this moment that is much less than pleasant. That there may not be a future at
all for me…
That was the scariest for me, especially since so
much of my future planning involves Amy and the kids. I didn’t fear dying but
I feared that maybe I won’t be there to experience all of my family’s next
“firsts”: First ball games, kisses, heartbreaks, driving, proms, graduations,
weddings, etc… And then the flip side thought was just as bad: the idea of
them not having me there either, and having to watch other kids’ dads in the
stands or audience, a constant reminder… And probably the worst thought of
all: That if I go quick, none of my kids will probably even have a genuine
memory about me (they are only 4 and 2). These thoughts brought on my
strongest sadness and tears. They will not actually ever know me.
A few days ago, I even read in a cancer book that
cancer patients should only live “in the now”. That this is actually healthy.
My thoughts were being validated…
But after the initial shock of the news and after
our initial research on prognosis’ stats on WebMD (don’t do this… not
helpful...), I have decided that living only in the “now” is far too limiting.
It does not give hope any room to breathe. And it certainly doesn’t offer up
much chance for dreams to help carry me through to the next day on any days
where “now” may be too heavy to deal with.
While I definitely think I will be more grounded
in my daily thoughts. I will not give up the dreams of what a great future I
am going to have with my family, friends, and career.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
