Is it the REAL Christmas yet?

I was speaking with one of the women in my support group and she said, "I don't think I'm going to do Christmas cards this year, I mean exactly WHAT do you say!" The answer is I have no idea but, as I've found with almost everything about being a widow, the hardest part is screwing up the courage to try. So here goes...

Let me start by acknowledging this year has been a difficult one. In addition to dealing with Eric's illness and death, we've moved half way across the country, started new schools, decorated an enormous white box of a house and made some wonderful new friends. I must admit listing it all makes me pause, and I lived it! None of his would have been possible without the love and support of too many people to name. Our gratitude for your compassion, kindness and care is immeasurable. We simply pray God will bless you in turn.

As for Team Plummer, we are adjusting to this new family of four. It's difficult, some times I look at a picture of Eric (I've finally taken them out of the boxes) and think, "I just can't believe you're actually gone." I know in my mind that it's true. I remember all the painful details and yet, part of me can't believe it. It is sort of how I feel when looking at the kids newborn pictures. I know they were that little. When we brought the girls home they were smaller than my forearm and yet, looking at them now, it's hard to believe they were ever that small. I'm told this is all very normal. Grief is a strange ride I must admit.

The girls are loving kindergarten and are reading above everyone's expectations. Their teacher raves about what good, kind and helping students they are. I am very proud but, must admit they have inherited their fathers love of school! They just finished a session of ballet at the park district (see the video on facebook). Chloe has committed to ballet, at least until she is 12. She wants to dance on her toes before she tries something new. Amanda is off to gymnastics in January. Ballet was fun but, the tumbling and balance beam are too enticing.

While Evan and I have had some epic battles, I believe the night he spent in his room with no toys, pillows or electricity was the turning point in our relationship. He and I are enjoying a new honeymoon period where in I have the official title of "bestest mommy". He is doing well in school and is due for another holiday program. I'm hoping it will be as hillarious as the fall program. Keep tuned for more video.

Evan asks me every morning, "Mommy is it the REAL Christmas yet?" What a joy it is to see the excitement of Christmas in a child's eyes. My wish for you this year is that you too might see the peace, love and joy of Christmas in a child's eyes, especially as you look in the mirror. For you too, are a child of God.

Blessings to you all!
Amy, Chloe, Amanda & Evan

P.S. As I mentioned in my previous post, I am switching to the facebook format. I know some of you have already followed me there. I hope many more of you will too! This however, will be my last post. I plan to leave the site up, I know there are some of you who come here just to see the pictures. Thank you again for walking this road with me. It was an honor to have you.