the short list

I've been sitting here for about an hour not knowing were to begin. I suppose listening to the "short" list of songs for Eric's funeral doesn't help. Music has always been such an important part of our lives. There are so many good ones that speak what we want to say about Eric's life, his death and our faith.

There's "A Cloud of Witnesses" by Mark Schultz, we felt such a connection to that song when we lost Emma. It paints the most wonderful picture of what heaven might be like when we enter it. Surrounded by the cloud of witnesses who've gone on before us, lining the streets of gold, cheering us on our way to the Throne of God.

I heard Caedmons Call, "There is a Reason" the other day. How can you not be encouraged by the line:

He makes all things good, He makes all things good. There's a time to live, a time to die, a time to wonder and to wonder why. There is a reason, there is a reason

Eric has always loved "I can only imagine".

Surrounded by your glory will my heart feel, will I dance for you Jesus or in awe of you be still, will I stand in your presence, or to my knees will I fall, will I sing Hallelujah, will I be able to speak at all, I can only imagine

And "Word of God Speak" from MercyMe. Speaks so to my heart these days. The lyrics

...all that I need is to be with you, and in the quiet hear your voice. Word of God speak, won't you pour down like rain, washing my eyes to see your majesty. To be still and know, that you're in this place. Please let me stay and rest, in your holiness. Word of God speak.

Eric has begun to "decline" as they say in hospice. He sleeps most of the day and is only awake and alert for a few hours each day. Yesterday those awake hours were very clear. Today's weren't so much. We expect his "good time" to continue to dwindle until a point when he no longer wakes up. At that point, I am told he will still be able to hear us even though he doesn't respond. It's hard to imagine Eric not having something to say in response. I may have to take advantage. It's hard because I see him torn between wanting to be done fighting and not wanting to leave.

I heard "Wish you were here" by Mark Harris for the first time on my way home from the hospital one late evening. I could just hear Eric saying the words to me and knew it would be sung at his funeral.

But don't cry for me, 'cause I'm finally free. To run with the angels in streets made of gold, to listen to stories of saints new and old. To worship our maker, that's where I'll be, when you finally find me. I wish you were here.

As much as I hate the idea of him being gone, I sure do like to think of him "finally free".
Thank you for your continued prayers! I've seen God's hand moving in ways I never imagined
Amy